Ocean Avenue
by mRsJaKeEpStEiN
Summary: This is an EmmaJay story. It is a song fic, with every song off of the Ocean Avenue CD by Yellowcard. I couldn't think of a good name, so I just used the cd title.
1. Chapter 1

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_"I think I'm breaking out  
I'm gonna leave you now  
There's nothing for me here, it's all the same  
And even though I know  
That everything might go  
Go downhill from here, I'm not afraid"_

**Emma's POV**

"WHAT!" a voice yells from down the hallway. It's a girls chilling voice, very loudly and you can tell that she's mad.

"Lexxi…don't cause a scene. I think it's for the best." A man's voice follows hers. It's deep and kind of scratchy.

"Don't you Lexxi me. Jerk. Rot in hell." She yells as I turn around. "Emma Nelson, just the girl I wanted to see." Alex grabs my shirt and throws me up against a locker with her fist in my face.

"Alex, stop it." Jay's voice says loudly. "If you hit her, I'll kill you. Take your hands off of her."

"You're lucky." She says in a very pissed off tone. "Very lucky. Watch your back Nelson."

"Sorry about that Emma. I had to tell her." Jay says to me in a soothing voice as he puts his hand on my lower back.

"Don't touch me, don't talk to me. Don't do anything that has to do with me. Don't look at me. I hate you." I say sharply as I turn around and slam my locker door.

_"Letting out the noise inside of me (Letting out the noise inside of me)  
Every window pane is shattering (Every window pane is shattering)  
Cutting up my words before I speak (Cutting up my words)  
This is how it feels to not believe"_

**Jay's POV**

I let myself into my house. There's no one home, as usual. I'm the only who really lives here. I guess in a couple of weeks Darcy will too, once her dad and my mom get married. I walk over to the refrigerator to get a drink of something. A note is stuck under the stupid magnet that says "Look what Jayson did!"

"Jayson, I went out to make some final wedding plans with Daniel. Darcy will be coming over later to drop off some of her stuff, be polite to her. There's lasagna in the fridge if you get hungry. I'll be home at about 8. I love you, Mom." I read out loud. "She's such a liar." I say to no one in particular.

I open the fridge and there's nothing in there. I guess I'll just have water. The doorbell rings loudly and it's off key. As I walk to the door I take my hat off and stick it on the hook. I kick my back pack out of the way and answer the door.

"Oh. Hi Darcy, come on in. Do you need help?" I ask her as I look into her eyes. It looks like she's been crying.

"Um, no thanks. It's just this one box, and then I'll leave. I'm sorry to be intruding like this." She says, her voice is shaky and she sounds like she wants to die.

"What's wrong Darcy? If I can ask."

"Um, it's just Chester. I thought that he liked me but he liked Manny…whatever."

"Chester? That freak? Don't get all hyped up about him. There are guys at our school that are like, 10 times better. Anyways, have you seen his mole?" I say trying to make her laugh. She lets out a little chuckle.

"Yeah, I'm going to leave now, I'm meeting some friends at the dot. See you later." She said as she lets herself out the door and waves.

_"How am I supposed to feel about the things I've done?  
I don't know if I should stay or turn around and run  
I know that I hurt you, things will never be the same  
The only love I ever knew, I threw it all away"_

**Sean's POV**

I just moved back. Ellie was just a little too happy for me to be home. I can hardly stand her right now. I left to get away from everyone giving me attention. And now she's smothering me. It's really annoying. I need to leave this house.

"El, I'm going for a walk. I'll be back later." I say loud enough for her to hear. I walk out of the door and let it slam before I can hear her response. As I walk down the street I keep thinking about Emma.

"Sean!" A high girls voice calls out to me. At first I think it's Ellie, but Ellie's voice doesn't sound like that. "Sean!" the voice calls again. I turn around to see Emma.

"Hey Emma, what's up?" I ask her as I squint against the sunlight.

"Who cares about me? You're back!" She says so excitedly. Like she's wanted me to come back to Degrassi.

"Emma, why are you so happy to see me? I knew Ellie would be, but I thought you'd be mad." I say to her as a smile creeps across my face.

"Why would I be mad? We're friends again. And…school hasn't been the same with out you." Emma says to me, still grinning from when I first said hi. Then her smile turns to a frown.

"What's wrong Emma?" I ask her as she turns around and starts walking away. "Em, wait up!" I start following her but a voice comes from behind me.

"She won't come back, I'm here. I guess she's pissed cause she's a slut now and it's my fault or whatever." The voice says. I turn around and see Jay.

"Hey man, what's up?"

"Nothing, so are you back for good? Or for a temporary visit?"

"I'm back to stay. What do you mean about Emma being a slut?" I say to him as my face turns from a smile to a frown.

"Nothing, just some stuff in the ravine or whatever."

"Right. What stuff in the ravine?"

"Nothing dude, it's history now. Don't worry about it."

"Ok…well Jay, I have to get back to my house so I can do something about Ellie. I can't stand her anymore. I'll talk to you at school." I say to him as I turn around and walk away.

_"If I could find you now things would get better  
We could leave this town and run forever  
I know somewhere, somehow we'll be together  
Let your waves crash down on me and take me away"_

**Emma's POV**

Dear Diary,

I was on a walk when I saw Sean. He's back for good, I think and hope. I don't feel like I can talk to him about what happened with Jay. It's too hard. I want him to know though. Sean and I were talking when Jay came up, I had to leave. I couldn't be around him. I hate Jay so much, but I like him. Do you understand? Never mind, diaries aren't people, they're just people. Oh well…that's all for now. Emma.

I finished writing in my diary and the phone started ringing, then Jack was crying. I scream to myself and answer the phone as I walk up the stairs to get Jack.

"Hello? Oh hi Manny, nope I'm babysitting Jack. Dang…I wish I could hang out. I don't want to be stuck here anymore. A party? Tonight? Probably. Yeah, I wanna go, sure, at seven? See you then." I hang up with her as I pick up Jack.

"Hey buddy. You're ok…Emmie has you. Don't worry." I say in a soothing voice as the phone rings again.

"Hello? Jay…leave me alone. I don't want to talk to you. No…no…I guess. Yes, tomorrow. Ok bye." I sigh as I hang up the phone. "I wish you were older then me Jack, so you could give me advice on what to do."

I walk downstairs with Jack in my arms and plop him into his high chair. I pour a few cheerios on his tray and pull out my homework. For some reason I cannot concentrate. I just keep thinking about Jay. He's so cute, especially without his hat on. I scream as the doorbell rings. I run to the door to answer it.

"Oh hi mom." I say to her as I open the door. "Manny invited me to a party, may I go?" I ask her hoping she'd say yes. She hadn't let me do much since I got the STD.

"I don't see why not. You haven't been out lately, sure you can go." She says a little preoccupied.

I feel like dancing inside my head. She never let me do anything, and now she is! I walk downstairs in a very happy mood.

"Hmm…what to wear, what to wear." I say to myself. "Too many clothes, so little time." I laugh at my own stupid comment. I search through my closet looking for something to wear, anything. I pull out a white skirt and a pink halter top. "I think this will suffice." I say out loud and pick out some white shoes.

_"We came together but you left alone  
And I know how it feels to walk out on your own  
Maybe someday I will see you again  
And you'll look me in my eyes and call me your friend"_

**Sean's POV**

After seeing Emma and Jay today, I had to get home. Ellie was calling my cell phone every two minutes, wanting to know where I was. Then I got a text message, "Sean…where are you? I'm worried…you left and you haven't come back yet." I read out loud. "Ok, whatever." I say as I start walking in the direction of my house.

I'm so sick of Ellie always suffocating me, telling me that she loves me every two seconds, just to keep me at home. But I don't WANT to be with her anymore. She acts like she'll die if I'm not around.

"Ellie, we need to talk." I say loudly as I close the door as to not let the cold air in. "It's important."

"What is it honey?" She asks coming out of the kitchen. I hadn't actually seen her since I got back, and I look at her. She's not Ellie Nash anymore, she's a Paige Michalchuk clone.

"What are you wearing?" I ask her as I look her up and down. "What the hell is this? You're not Ellie, you're Paige now."

"I thought you'd like it. I mean…every other guy at school does." Ellie looks me in the eyes, pouting a little bit. Her red hair clashes with her pink skirt so badly. But only I can tell. She probably wishes she was blonde. So she could be Ellie/Paige.

"I'm not every other guy." I sigh loudly running over what to say in my head. "Ellie, we need to break up. This isn't working for me."

"But honeybee." She says, using a cheesy pet name. Only Paige does that, she is Ellie/Paige now, no longer Ellie Nash.

"Don't use that stupid pet name. I don't want to be your honeybee." I say getting angry and starting to yell. "I DON'T WANT YOU LIVING HERE ANYMORE. I JUST WANT YOU OUT!" I yell as she takes a step back.

"Sean, you're scaring me…please stop." She says softly, trying to soothe me with her stupid Paige talk.

"NO. GET OUT. GO LIVE WITH ASHLEY OR SOMETHING. JUST LEAVE!" I yell as she begins to cry. I walk away and slam the door to my room. I can't stop pacing around as I hear her sobbing outside my door.

"Sean, why? Why!" she says to the door. "Why!"

"Just pack your stuff El, get out…if I leave this room, you'll be sorry." I say as I lay down on my bed. "I can't stand this." I say to myself as I turn on my stereo full blast. The bass of the rock song pounds through the walls and my neighbor hits the wall, I ignore him.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Reviews! Thank you for your reviews!

**spikegothchick**: That chapter was just warming up, I hope you like this one more.

**Lost2Thoughts: **I'm glad you liked it!

**crashetburn: **Yeah, i kind of am, i don't mind Sellie though.

**knightsgirl: **He was kind of OOC, and I don't think he'll be in this anymore.

_"Waking up from this nightmare  
How's your life, what's it like there?  
Is it all what you want it to be?  
Does it hurt when you think about me?  
And how broken my heart is"_

**Jay's POV**

I woke up quickly as the door opened and slammed.

"Jayson?" my mom's scratchy, smoker's voice said.

"Yeah mom?" I asked softly, I had a morning voice. You know? All groggy kind of…like in the morning. "What do you need?"

"Nothing, I was just wondering if you were here. I didn't see your car outside." My mom said softly, as if she was trying not to wake a baby.

"That's because it's in the garage mom. But, I am going to leave in a little while if that's ok. There's this party, and I have to make an appearance." I replied to her, she was drunk I could tell. Daniel probably drove her home, I would hope. It's very doubtful sometimes. I wonder if he really loves her, or is just saying that to get in her pants.

"Um…sure I guess. As long as you're home by 3." She yawned loudly, it was very obnoxious. "I'm going to bed, I'm tired."

"Ok. I'll see you after school tomorrow." I say to her as I walk to my room to get changed up. "Hat or no hat?" I ask myself softly. Trying not to wake my mother. Though it seems that she isn't asleep, I can hear her throwing up. "Sick." I say.

At 9 I walk out of my house and open the garage. I unlock my car and slide into the driver's seat slowly. Every time I get into my car I get happier. It makes me grin. It's like my child. I love it so much. I put the key in the ignition and my car roars to life. The rock music pounds through the sixteen independent speakers. I drive away quickly, escaping from my house, my mom and her psychotic natures.

"_Broken this fragile thing now  
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces  
And I've thrown my words all around  
But I can't, I can't give you a reason"_

**Emma's POV**

Manny and I walked into the party at seven thirty. Manny was wearing a pair of low cut blue jeans and a red tube top. She saw Spinner across the room and ditched me. Great, I thought as I looked around the room, hoping to catch the face of someone I knew. I caught someone's eye, but no one I wanted to talk to.

"Emma." He said as I started to walk away. "Please, talk to me, just for once…please?" He asked me.

"Fine, you have 3 minutes. Not a second more." I said to him glaring softly.

"Um, ok." He started out, "Emma, I like you, I chose you for a reason. I wouldn't have asked you…if I didn't like you." He said slowly.

"Ok and you like Amy too right?" I said to him grimly, trying to get him to see that he can't always use that excuse.

"Amy was drunk, she never knew what she was doing. I was drunk. But you, were never drunk, when you came, I was never drunk. I knew…" He looked into my eyes and I could see that he was pained. He wanted me to understand, but I wouldn't listen.

"Jay, I really liked you. More than anything else, but you screwed up…you made me not want to be with you anymore. And for that, you should be sorry." I said to him, trying to keep eye contact. Someone bumped into me and pushed me into him. "Sorry." I said quietly. Then he took my chin in his hands and kissed me softly.

"I had to do that." He said disappearing in the crowd. I watched the spot where he once was as Manny came up to me and tried to get my attention. I could hear her saying "Emma" over and over again, but I wouldn't listen. I walked to the spot where he was trying to find him, anywhere.

"_Here I go so dishonestly  
Leave a note for you my only one  
And I know you can see right through me  
So let me go and you will find someone"_

**Jay's POV**

I walked into that party, hoping in some ways that Emma would be there, but hoping in others she would not. I needed to talk to her, but I was afraid she wouldn't talk, that she'd just shove it in my face and walk away. But I kissed her, I talked for a minute, and then I kissed her. It was shocking; I don't know what possessed me to do that. And after I kissed her, I just started walking away. I didn't know what to do, I was scared. But I can feel her walking behind me, she's not calling out my name.

"Jay. Please, stop." She says shakily as I unlock my car which was parked down the street.

"Em, I don't know what possessed me, I'm sorry." I said to her, turning around an looking her in the eyes.

"Um, it's ok, I guess. It didn't mean anything." She said, tears filling her eyes.

"No, Em, it did mean something." I say pushing her hair out of her face and wiping the tears away. "I did it because, I like you." I said as I lean in and kiss her again. I pull away after a minute and get into my car. I drive off, leaving her in the dust.

"I'm sorry Emma." I whisper to the road as I drive full speed into no where.

**Emma's POV**

I can't believe that, he kissed me again. He told me he liked me, but if he really did…he wouldn't have driven off, would he? I walk back into the party and over to Manny.

"I'm leaving now, it's getting late." I say to her, half paying attention.

"Alright. See you tomorrow." She says as she walks back over to Spinner and they start making out again. I hate her for that so much.

"_If I could I would do all of this again  
Travel back in time with you to where this all began  
We could hide inside ourselves and leave the world behind  
And make believe there's something left to find"_

**Jay's POV**

I'm driving, and I have no clue where I am. I've been driving for hours, the clock reads four fifteen. I should turn around, and drive back to Degrassi, but I can't. I can't go back to where I've fucked everything up. I turn the stereo on and Yellowcard is playing. The last person to ride in my car with me was Alex. She loved Yellowcard, and I never turned on the CD player except with her, and she left her CD in there.

The clock flashed 7 when I pulled up to the beach I knew so well. Nope, not Wasega, but a beach without a name. It was on one of the great lakes, I didn't know which one, nor did I care. I walked up to the little beach shake and knocked on the door.

"Hold on." A groggy male's voice came from inside. I knocked harder wanting to get out of the wind. "Hold your horses, shit, I'm coming." The voice called again. The door opened slowly.

"Jayson? What are you doing here?" He asked me as he motioned for me to come inside. "Come in; hurry, out of the wind and sea mist." He said as I walked inside and closed the door behind me.

"Um, Uncle Tommy, I'm here to live. With you if you'll let me. I'm having some trouble at school, and…I need to escape." I said slowly, wondering if I had made the right decisions.

"Jay, your mother called me. Worried sick, you hadn't come home." Tommy said to me as I scoffed.

"Like she even gave a shit. She knew I was leaving, she just didn't know to where." I said roughly.

"Do you want something to drink? Or eat?" Tommy asked me, changing the subject.

"Water, thanks." I said as he left the room. I heard him pick up the phone. "Tina, everything's fine. Jay's here. Ok. I will. Bye." He said ending the short conversation with his twin sister. He walked back with a glass of ice water.

"Here you go." He said handing me the water. "Now let's talk, about why you're here." He said, fully open to my story.

"It all started at the beginning of the year. There was this kid, Rick, and he'd put his ex-girlfriend into a coma the year before. He came back to school and Alex, my now ex-girlfriend, and her friends wanted to get rid of him. So we tried pretty hard. And he just wouldn't leave. So then Spinner and I picked on him, a whole lot, and he spray painted X's onto our cars. So by this time, Spin and I were pretty pissed." I stopped to take a drink of water.

"So, you picked on this kid, I'm not seeing where this is headed." Tommy said to me, looking into my eyes.

"You will." I paused and continued. "So, there was this 'Whack-Your-Brain' thing at school, a knowledge contest. And the team was Jimmy, Emma, Toby, and Rick. At least, I think that's who they were. Well, there was this final round and Rick was the one answering the last question." I paused and took a drink. "And Alex, Spinner, and I thought it'd be fun to pour yellow paint and feathers on him when he won." I sighed, memories rushing into my head.

"Ok…I still don't see the ending." Tommy said somewhat impatiently.

"This is just the beginning. So, Rick left at lunch and came back, with a gun. And we didn't know he had the gun and Spin and I talked loudly in the bathroom, blaming it on Jimmy." I took a long drink. "And, Rick shot Jimmy, and now Jimmy is paralyzed." I said, continuing my story. "Then, he pointed the gun at my friend Emma, because Emma didn't want to kiss him." I sighed.

"Ok, I'm getting the drift here, I think. Did he shoot Emma?"

"No, because my best friend Sean wrestled the gun away from him, and it ended up killing Rick. So Sean ran home to mommy, and he was in Wasega beach, until he moved back yesterday."

"Ok, so, you think it's your fault Jimmy got shot?" Tommy asked me.

"It is my fault, but that's not the end. A few weeks ago, I hit on Emma. And I was still dating Alex, but I invited Emma to the Ravine and, we hooked up. I'd also hooked up with Alex's friend Amy. And it turned out that I had gonorrhea and, gave it to Alex, Amy, and Emma."

"Jay, didn't your mother teach you about having protected sex!" Tommy yelled.

"We didn't have real sex, and my story isn't finished." I snapped at him. "So, I fell in love with Emma, I guess my feelings just unearthed a few days ago. So last night, at a party, I kissed her and drove off. Because I don't know what to do anymore." I said my eyes filling up with tears.

Tommy moved his chair by me and patted my back. "It's all right Jay, don't worry. I'll help you deal."

"_Was it fun for you to watch him fall apart? (Watch me fall)  
And suffocate him while you held him in your arms (in your arms)  
I swear to God I wish he never let you in (let you in)  
And I just hope we never hear from you again"_

**Emma's POV**

I walked up to school the next morning, upset about Jay. I was hoping to see his car outside the school when I got there, I was hoping to see him. But he wasn't there, neither was his car. I saw Sean in the hallway and I ran up to him, my skirt swaying a little.

"Sean! Have you seen Jay today?" I asked him standing next to him.

"Nope, but I know where he is." He said to me, kind of sharply.

"Ok, can you tell me where he is?" I asked him looking at the anger on his face.

"He's on some beach, somewhere, a drink in his hand." Sean said, imitating some country song.

"Seriously Sean, tell me please." I said to him, begging a little.

"He's with his uncle, who lives off of some Great Lake. He's not coming back." Sean said walking away. "I come back and you send my best friend away. Thanks Em." He said coldly as I stopped walking.

I stood there, silently waiting for someone to say something, but everyone just walked around me. As if I wasn't there. Manny came up to me and said "You're the talk of the whole school, what does it feel like to send someone away forever? What, that's the second person this school year?" She said in a bitchy tone.

"Manny, I didn't make either of them go away. It's their choice." I said walking away from her, escaping from the school. I walked back to my house and sat down on the porch. Not wanting to go in and tell my mom why I was ditching school. The front door opened and my mom stepped out.

"Em, would you like to tell me why you're here, rather than at school?" She asked me with a fake smile in her voice.

"I'm here because, I can't stand being at home. I want to leave, forever that school is killing me. Manny blamed me for Jay and Sean leaving forever, even though Sean's back." I said beginning to cry.

"Jay left?" She asked me softly sitting next to me and wrapping an arm around me.

"Yeah, he kissed me last night. It was an amazing kiss, but now he's gone…he left. He's by a great lake or something Sean said. He doesn't know why." I said crying harder.

My mom just pulled me into a tight hug and let me cry on her shoulder for a while longer.

"_late night drives, all alone in my car  
I can't help but start  
singing lines from all our favorite songs  
and melodies in the air"_

**Jay's POV**

I sat on the beach, close to the water in just a pair of shorts that Tommy lent me. I can't stop thinking. Is it Emma I wanna be with? Is it Alex? What do I want with my life? I start to cry a little, I can't help it. I'm hurting so badly, I fucked up my own little world. I screwed up Emma's life too. I could care less about me than I could about her. I want her life to be perfect, maybe that's why I left.

It's some, holiday in the states so there's no school. I start tomorrow, at Greenville High. It sounds preppy as hell. I wipe the tears away from my eyes and sit there, staring off in to nothing when a football hits me in the back.

"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!" A girl says softly as I turn around. "Are you, new here?" She asks, she sounds like a Barbie.

"Yes, I'm living with my uncle for the time being. I'm Jay." I hold out my hand to the Barbie and she shakes it.

"Stacy. It's nice to meet you. That's Kelly up there, and David over there, and Emma." She says as I glance over to see a blonde girl who looks like Emma Nelson. "What school are you going to go to?" She asks me sweetly, staring into my eyes.

"Greenville High, I think is what Tommy said. I dunno, it sounds gay." I say coldly, wanting to go back to Emma in my mind.

"That's where we go, well except for Kelly, she goes to Degrassi, in Toronto, you ever heard of it? She's visiting her cousin."

"I used to go to Degrassi, yesterday actually. I needed to escape though." I say as Stacy motions to her friends to come over.

"Kelly, do you know Jay? He goes to Degrassi." She says in her Barbie tone.

"Yeah, Mr. STD right?" Kelly says in a bitchy tone. "Of course, Manny's told the whole Spirit Squad about Emma Nelson. I got a text from Manny, saying little Jay-Jay had run away."

I stand up and walk away, humming silently to myself. It was all I could do not to punch Kelly. I'd always hated that bitch.

"Take it off, take it all off girl." I sing, a stupid line from one of the songs Emma loved the most. I laugh a little, wondering what Emma was doing.

"Am I more than you bargained for yet, I've been dying to tell you anything, you wanna hear, that's just who I am this week. Isn't it messed up, how I'm just dying to be him." That reminds me of when I broke Emma and Sean up last year. I loved Emma and I wanted to be with her, but Sean had her. And I wanted to hurt myself for doing that.


End file.
